Homeschool Conference!!!

Look at all those beautiful little feet two people can create!

Look at all those beautiful little feet two people can create!

Friday, May 27, 2011


Spent my day and evening laying in bed with a dumb old ear infection and fever...the only plus side was that I didn't have to make dinner or clean up and my hubby rented a movie for me to enjoy while I lay here wasting my time.  I think I should be grateful to be laying in bed not having to do a thing, but I don't do that really well.  All I find myself doing is thinking of all the things I need to do or wish to do, so a movie was in order to take my mind off of such things.  Shortly into the movie, I found myself grabbing a notebook just to jot down little thoughts that came to me..  CRAZY I know, but it's just who I am...there were lessons to be learned and I couldn't miss them (or forget them if I failed to make note of them).

So the movie of choice was EAT PRAY LOVE...hadn't seen it, wanted to see it in the theaters, but didn't so this was the perfect night for such an activity.  And my dear hubby had to be gone for the evening, so this would make it pass just a smidge more quickly.  As I was laying here feeling a tad bit sorry for myself that I was all alone watching a chick flick that really should involve a bunch of girlfriends, my sweet daughter came up to join me, no longer alone ~ :0)  yippee.

To begin with I don't know that most hubbies would enjoy this movie at all...and for good reason, the wife (Julia Roberts) decides she doesn't want to be married any longer.  (But I do have to say, that I probably wouldn't have wished to be married to him either...not that he was horrible or anything,'ll have to see it for yourself to decide)  Anyway...she decided to take a little sabbatical from life...she called it a Truth Seeking Journey. 

The movie went through her "journey" of finding herself, learning to love herself and her realization that truth will not be withheld from you.

I, for one, think it would be simply amazing to go through her little experience, only I wouldn't leave my marriage, I'd be taking along that special man of mine...and I'd have to wait until all my kiddos were grown.  Aside from those little details, I cannot imagine how wonderful and empowering and peaceful and exhilerating and exciting and grounding an experience like hers would be for a person or for a couple.

She took one year and visited three destinations...the first was to Eat ~ she spent her time in Italy and ate to her hearts content.  She toured and learned the language and learned to love the people (I believe this was her first step in learning to love herself... to learn to love others)  Here, she began to open herself, she struggled with being "ALONE", yet it was something she "needed" in order to begin healing.

She also gave some pretty cute advice to a friend of hers regarding her "muffin top" she had acquired from eating all the delicious food of Italy...I won't share it, but it was pretty funny and accurate! 
Her time in Italy seemed so enjoyable and yummy and was again just her first step in this little journey.

After leaving the gourmet foods of Italy, she headed to India ~ her focus was to PRAY, to MEDITATE, to find God~ she found that God lives within her...In the beginning of the movie, while still in her marriage, she prays to God for the first time and pours her heart out pleading for direction, for help...she didn't "know" Him and had a deep desire to find Him and to feel Him.  It was beautiful when she finally recognized that we have a special spirit within us ~ she worded it differently stating that God isn't out there, He lives within us..but the point is she finally "Found" Him.  Made me think back to my first prayer as an adult, and my life as it has changed because of knowing and trusting and loving Him. 

While in India, she met up with an older man, who came across a little too harsh and yucky...but he became a mentor and a true friend to her.  He had some of the best advice for her during her struggles, now mind you, most of this came during her moments of protest and disatisfaction with him.  But those words of wisdom became gems for her growth.  One morning, she was struggling deeply with meditation (in a group setting) and walked out, he followed her and basically asked her what her problem was...she responded with "I just want Peace."  To which he abruptly replied, "If you want to sit in the castle, you have to swim the moat."  She was a little miffed at him and commented that she couldn't keep her thoughts together during this meditation process, that she couldn't keep up with what was happening around her.  He told her that meditation was not about anything outside of her, simply the things within.  And added (which I love by the way) "Select your thoughts the same way you select your clothes each day."
I LOVED that whole conversation...
In our home I have a little quote hanging in our kitchen that reads,.
I think this goes right along with that...WE ARE IN CONTROL ~ we simply need to recognize that fact within ourselves and we can find all the happiness, joy, peace, what have you, that we desire...
It is all about the thoughts and choices we "choose" or select to have...mighty empowering to be awakened to such a truth...what a valuable tool to teach to our kiddos ~ they are in control...they have the choice.

(Back to Julia)  During her time in India is where she learned to forgive herself...forgive herself for a failed marriage, failed relationships, failed whatever...  She had been so worried about others forgiving her that she failed to see the most vital part ~ She had to first forgive herself...again she had a deep need to learn to love herself and find value in herself.  While in India, she loved others in a way she had not experienced previously, which was so healing and beautiful for her.

Her final destination was Balai ( I think, not absolutely positive on that one)  Anyway, this was a magical ending for her Truth Seeking Journey...
It was here that she would truly find herself and allow herself to be just who she was, to learn to trust, to learn to love, to finally for once be at peace within herself.  This was a true stuggle for her.  She met with a "medicine man" frequently who would read her hands and look into her face and her eyes...he counseled her and gave her strength.  she relied greatly on him.  I think he was in a way a bit of a savior for her...he helped her to see the things that were within that she still had failed to recognize.  This was a beautiful transformation for her.
At one point, she nearly threw away one of the most important "things" that had come her way...because of fear...fear of losing herself again...she felt she had found a "balance" and if she gave herself away that balance would be lost and she would no longer be loveable nor desirable because she feared she would go back to the same person she had been.  The LOVE of the story takes place here...a darling man who was deeply in love with her (as she was with him, but couldn't bring herself to admit) told her that she misunderstood balance and said these words to her, "Balance is not letting anybody love you less than you love yourself."  She stormed off shouting I don't need to love you to love myself....this is where I began to doubt she'd truly learned a thing...she was packed and ready to head back to the states when she made her final visit to the "medicine man" ~ he sensed  something a little different, a little sad and she tried to explain her thoughts  of losing herself again.  I loved how he responded to her, quite possibly it was more the deep sincerity in his eyes as he spoke, but nevertheless, these are the words he shared with her, "Sometimes to lose balance for love is part of living balance in life."   Hmmm...took me a few minutes for that one to completely sink in....

We cannot fear so much that we fail to will feel out of balance for us from time to time (possibly more often than not)...but how sad it would be to always live a life of fear...there would be no living at all, just surving, just being, but the living would be missing...

I remember feeling so many of these exact feelings when I met my dear husband. 
After a failed marriage, failed relationships and much sadness and sorrow, I truly did not want to repeat those things in my world ever again.  I greatly feared the immense love I felt for him, I wanted to push him away, wanted to run the other direction, but my heart was screaming inside to me that he was different, that he would truly love me and would always treat me well...that there was nothing to fear.  It took many, many years to be completely rid of the fears that I had, but I am so grateful that I jumped in with both feet and a huge heart full of love for him.  My life would have been empty without him...I would not have been truly "living" all of these wonderful years we've been together, if he were not present in my life.

So, back to the movie...after hearing the wise counsel of this medicine man, she rushes to her darling man and to make it short and sweet ~ they live happily ever after.  (doesn't that just make your heart smile???)  I loved it!

Truth Seeking Journeys...Do they all need to be a year long sabbatical?  I think would be nice, but reality is reality and a year long is simply not possible or even necessary for most.  Whether they are external or internal, a truth seeking journey is something I think we do on a continual basis...aren't we always hungering for truth, for answers, for peace, for growth...

I will end with one of my favorite quotes again from this little movie ~
"If you want to sit in the castle ~
You have to swim the moat."

It takes effort,
it takes work,
it takes faith
to make the journey...

Have a beautiful day ~ enjoy the rain...